(click to see a larger image)

Comal V.Subramanian

Coming to Bhagavan ^[1]

Comal Venkata Subramaniam

(1922-2018)

At the age of eighteen while studying aircraft engineering, Comal Subramaniam came to see Bhagavan along with his mother. Just a week before, he had informed her of his intention to join the army as an aviation engineer during the Second World War. But she feared for his life and would only permit his joining if Bhagavan gave his permission.

His mother, Srimati Rajammal Venkataraman, had long been an ardent devotee of Bhagavan and had come to Bhagavan through Janaki Matha. When Comal got a week-long leave, they made the trip to Ramanasramam in what would be his first darshan. He recalls:

We reached Tiruvannamalai at dawn on January 14th, 1940, Makara Sankranti, and took a bullock cart ride to the Ashram. During this ride, my mother was utterly absorbed in thoughts of Bhagavan and she consistently chanted his name while I was repeating “Om Namo Bhagavathe Sri Ramanaya”p>

(click to see a larger image)

Mother Rajammal and Comal
((circa 1940)

They found Bhagavan sitting in the hall with about ten devotees, including Devaraja Mudaliar and Muruganar, names not yet known to Comal then:

The instant I saw him, all thoughts vanished from my mind and I was sucked into his ocean of grace. We stood and offered our pranams.

The two sat before Bhagavan to meditate but found they could not close their eyes owing to the captivating pull of Bhagavan’s physical form. Whenever Bhagavan glanced at them, Comal felt a ray of light from Bhagavan’s eyes passing through him. For the first few hours, Comal was disoriented by the influence of Bhagavan’s presence and it was as though he did not know where he was. Each time a question quietly presented itself within him, that very moment it would be answered by responses to other devotees. He felt as if he had become lost in Bhagavan’s abiding presence and only when the bell rang for lunch did he know that so much time had passed.

Bhagavan instructed everyone to proceed to the dining hall and Comal was blessed to be seated near Bhagavan. Observing Bhagavan mixing together all the food items served on his leaf, Comal thought to himself, “Everyone is equal under this roof.”

On the second day, Comal’s mother came forward with the intention of posing her question. But before she said anything, Bhagavan who was reading the newspaper, looked up and said, “You look weary. Don’t think now. Go and take rest.” They promptly obeyed his words. On the third day, when they came forward a second time, Bhagavan said: poi giripradakshinam pannittu vaangolen (“Why don’t you go for pradakshina of the Hill”). They immediately left on girivalam. On the fourth and final day, they approached him to take leave:

When we went and stood before Bhagavan, he enquired of us with great affection. We sought his blessings before leaving and added a note about my participation in the war. Bhagavan, gave an effervescent smile, and said besha pannungo (“Of course, certainly do!”), an unreserved go-ahead. Bhagavan’s smile continued to transmit grace on us. I felt as if I was having the darshan of the Sun-God, Lord Surya, Himself.

Serving in the army, one night, Comal was put on guard duty in the jungles of the Rawalpindi area near what is now Islamabad, armed with a rifle. The ordeal of a lonely cool night became scarier when he heard the howling of jackals. The young Comal contrasted this experience with that of Bhagavan’s darshan:

I recalled sitting before Bhagavan, accumulating his grace, visualizing his smile. I imagined asking him, “When will you take me out of this place? When will you grant me your darshan again? I am so fortunate to have been in your presence but why do I have to suffer in this wild jungle?’” Saying this I glanced at the full moon. In the moon, smiling down on me Bhagavan gave me his darshan, re-energizing and sustaining me. From that moment, whenever I saw the moon on the full moon day, I remember Bhagavan’s face and tell my friends that I see Bhagavan smiling in the full moon.

Further assurances of Bhagavan’s grace became apparent in 1942, when nearly the whole city of Madras was evacuated and Comal was posted to serve with the British in the areas of Lahore, Ambala, and Karachi. Getting leave was nearly impossible. His colleagues were mercilessly denied permission for leave even in cases of family tragedy. But Comal was desperate to have Bhagavan’s darshan. He thus petitioned for a one-week leave:

Before entering my commander’s office, I meditated on Bhagavan. On seeing my petition, the commander, Mr. Small, put on a chirpy smile and immediately approved it without saying a word. I was jubilant and attributed the happening to Bhagavan’s recurrent grace.

At Ramanasramam, Comal sat in the hall and hearing an announcement that sadhus would be fed outside after the main meal. Bhagavan quietly slipped out of the hall. When the lunch bell rang, everyone was waiting for Bhagavan. But when asked about the delay, Bhagavan said, “I am also a sadhu, so I went out”. From that time onwards, sadhus were fed first.

One Karthigai Deepam, when devotees were assembled outside the hall in front of the Holy Hill awaiting the lighting of the Deepam flame, Bhagavan was facing the devotees with his back towards the mountain. Comal recalls:

Sitting in absolute stillness with his eyes closed, right at the moment when the Deepam flame was about to be lit, Bhagavan opened his eyes and turned round to see it. At that moment, I could see Bhagavan radiating intense luminosity as powerful as the Deepam Flame Itself. I immediately prostrated before him for granting me such a darshan and such blessings.